


the darkest nights, never felt so bright (with you by my side)

by eddiebles



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bill Denbrough is a Good Friend, Bisexual Bill Denbrough, Child Abuse, Daddy Kink, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Eddie calls Richie "sun", Eddie has an aunt, Feminization, Fluff and Smut, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, Mentions of Eddie doing stuff with other men, Mentions of Underage Sex, New Kid Eddie Kaspbrak, Original Character(s), Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Soccer Player Richie Tozier, Sonia Kaspbrak Being Terrible, There's a scene where Eddie is a minor and is masturbating, Wentworth Tozier Being an Asshole, Wentworth is not a good father, car handjobs, i think that is everything ??, kinda angsty ???, they are both 18, very brief - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:16:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25169071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eddiebles/pseuds/eddiebles
Summary: He wants to pull Eddie into his arms and apologize for being so scared. He wants to tell Eddie that he loves him and kiss him till the other boy can feel how much Richie loves him. He wants to tell Eddie that he doesn’t care about what his dad thinks and finally hold Eddie’s hand in the hallway and show off for the world to see that Eddie Kaspbrak is my fucking boyfriend!But Richie doesn’t do that, instead he watches Eddie's retreating figure disappear around the corner because Richie Tozier does care what his dad thinks and he can’t kiss Eddie in front of people and he can’t hold Eddie’s hand in the hallways and show Eddie off as his boyfriend. He just can’t.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Minor Eddie Kaspbrak/Original Male Character(s), Minor Richie Tozier/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 72





	the darkest nights, never felt so bright (with you by my side)

**Author's Note:**

> hi !! this is my very first fic that i have ever posted in this the IT fandom so i'm kind of nervous . i started this fic a longggggg time ago , i think way back when i first joined the fandom in 2015-2016 but never had the motivation to finish it until IT chapter one came out . 
> 
> anyways i hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it :-))
> 
> title is from Outer Space / Carry On by 5 Seconds Of Summer

Richie can feel the sweat drip down past the collar of his shirt. 

The bright lights shine down on him, making his whole body warm and tingly. He loved the feeling of the stadium lights, it makes him feel like he’s the center of everyone’s attention. And he is. Everyone’s eyes follow him as he juggles the ball between his feet, dodging away from the other teams players as they try to steal it away from him. _Go Richie. Go Richie. Go Go Go!_

He kicks the ball. It flies toward the corner of the goal post. The other team's goalie jumped up to block it but that didn’t stop the ball from hitting the back of the net. He thinks that the crowd got even louder than before. 

The buzzer went off, signaling the end of the first half. They were ahead by two points. He turned towards the crowd, pumping his arms in the air as a large grin took over his face. They respond by screaming their support. _GO BEAVERS!_

His eyes scanned the crowd in search of a certain boy, seeing him in the center of the stands.

“I’m winning this game just for you!” Richie screams towards the crowds, but his stare is directly at the boy before Richie turns back around to go towards the coach. The crowd interrupts in cheers. 

Richie kicks the ball. It dodges the goalie’s fingertips by an inch. The final buzzer sounded. The score was 12-3. They won. Just for _him._ Always for him _._

+

It’s been thirty minutes since the game ended and Richie Tozier was leaning against the metal pole underneath the bleachers. The only light was coming from the stadium that still happened to be on. He was freshly showered, his curls were still damp and pushed back by a headband. He was tired and sore and frustrated. After the game he was pulled aside and chewed out by the coach, Coach Tozier (yes his father was the coach), for not playing hard enough. Richie made most of the goals but that still wasn’t enough for his dad. Nothing was ever enough. _He_ was never enough. 

A poke to his rib pulls him out of his head, his bad mood instantly vanishes when he breathes in the familiar scent of lavender. A bright grin takes over his face as he turns his body sideways to face the person. 

“Richard Tozier!” The boy exclaimed, reaching his hands to his face and gasping in fake shock. “I can’t believe it’s really you. This is a dream come true, can you be so generous and give me an autograph?!” 

Richie lets out a chuckle, shaking his head at the silliness that is his boyfriend. “Shut up Eds.” Richie says before making grabby hands towards Eddie. “Shut up and c’mere, silly.”

Eddie rolls his eyes, seeming annoyed, but his smile begged a differ. He shuffles closer to Richie, their bodies barely touching. Richie snaked his arms underneath Eddies, clasping them together behind Eddie’s back and resting his arms on the curve of Eddie’s hips. 

“Wow, I can’t believe I am in the Richie Tozier’s arms right now.” Eddie joked, his eyes lighting up with amusement as Richie looked at him. Eddie was bundled up in a large hoodie that just so happened to be Richie’s, it was a light purple one that he had gotten a while ago. His hair was still a bit windblown from being outside for so long, making the boy look ten times softer than he already was. The tip of Eddie’s nose and the apples of his cheeks were tinted red by the nippy January air. He was so fucking beautiful.

“I missed you.” Richie said. Eddie’s eyes softened, cocking his head slightly to the side as he looked at Richie with a look that was reserved just for him. Richie felt Eddie’s small fingers clutching the material of his sweater.

“Richie, we saw each other this morning.” Eddie said, making Richie sighed loudly and duck his face into the crook of Eddie’s neck, mumbling something against his skin that Eddie couldn’t quite catch. His arms tightened around Eddie. “Sun, what’s got you all upset?” Eddie asked, cradling Richie’s head closer to him. 

“Nothing, I miss you s’all.” Richie replied and if Eddie wasn’t so attuned to Richie, he would’ve believed him, he would’ve brushed Richie’s behaviour away. 

“Is it your dad again?” 

Richie groaned, sending vibrations through Eddie’s skin. “Same ol’ pops. Can never please the man.” Richie summarized. 

Eddie knew about Wentworth Tozier’s behaviour toward his son, about how he pushed Richie too hard and never gave him any time to breathe, he knew about the drunken nights and empty whiskey bottles and the yelling. Eddie knew everything. And it made him angry. He hated Wentworth Tozier for making this wonderful boy feel like he was never enough.

“Richie… You are amazing okay? Don’t listen to him.” Eddie mumbled, pressing a light kiss on the top of Richie’s head. “The best person I’ve ever met.” 

Eddie’s words brought a wave of warmth throughout Richie’s body. Eddie hadn’t said much, he didn’t need to, because what he said was enough. Richie lifts his head up from its place on Eddie’s shoulder. “I love you.” Richie said, kissing the space between Eddie’s furrowed eyebrow before pulling back to look at him. Silence engulfed the couple. Richie’s eyes flickered to Eddie’s lips. He wants to lean down and feel the soft flesh between his teeth, he wants to taste the sweetness of the cherry coke that his boyfriend had during the game. He wants to kiss Eddie. 

Eddie beats him to it first. 

Their lips moved desperately together at first, bodies pressed close together, hands roaming. But then their rhythm became slower and more steady. It overwhelms Richie how hot Eddie can make him in a matter of minutes. Richie slips his tongue into Eddie’s mouth and Eddie whines, pulling Richie’s body closer, wanting more. Eddie’s hands slid up to Richie’s neck and slid underneath Richie’s headband, taking fistfuls of his hair in his hands and tugged lightly. Richie could feel himself beginning to harden in his pants and judging by Eddie’s small whimpers, he felt it too. 

Richie tightened his hold on his boyfriend's body. He took Eddie’s bottom lip between his teeth and tugged lightly as he felt Eddie grind against his dick. “Honey,” Richie pants as he pulls away, his tone warning. Eddie raises his eyebrow at him, his cheeks flushed with a darker shade of red. Eddie’s mouth was raw and bitten, slicked with his and Richie’s spit and his eyes were glazed over. Looking at Eddie didn’t help soften Richie’s dick like he needed to happen, Eddie was a damn dream.

“Do you want me to stop?” Eddie questions as he pushes himself up on his tippy-toes to press wet kisses across Richie’s jawline and down the right side of his neck. He presses himself against Richie again before pulling back to look at his boyfriend. “What’s wrong Tozier?” 

Richie gives him _the look_ , making Eddie sigh. Eddie pulls back to look at Richie with a small pout on his red plump lips.

Richie leans his head back on the pole and closes his eyes. “Not here. My dad could see us.” He opens his eyes again after a few moments to see Eddie still looking at him, but this time it was different. The pout on his lips are now replaced with a small smile. His face lingered with an emotion that Richie couldn’t pinpoint.

“He left a few minutes before I came. Saw him pulling out of his spot.” Eddie says, letting his arms fall from their place on Richie’s shoulders and leaned back. Richie suddenly missed the warmth of Eddie pressed closely to him.

“There could still be people here and they can see and-” 

Eddie nods his head as he bit his lip. “And that would be bad. I know.” A moment of silence passed before Eddie distanced himself from Richie.

“I need to get going.” Eddie said, not meeting the older boy's eyes as he wiped his lips with the sleeve of his hoodie. 

“Baby… Don’t be like this.” Richie pleads, as he takes Eddie’s limp hand in his. Eddie felt so far away now and he would do anything to have Eddie near him again. Richie feels the panic rise up his throat. He wants to throw up. Why is Richie always so afraid all the time? 

“I have to go.” Eddie says again but now he was looking at Richie. “My aunt is probably worried.” 

Richie knew Eddie was lying and Eddie knew that Richie knew he was lying. His aunt was out of town for the week for a wedding and wouldn’t be coming back for another three days. Richie had even come over yesterday since Eddie had the whole house to himself, but Richie didn’t point out the lie. Instead he says, “I thought we were hanging out tonight.” 

Eddie pulls his hand away from Richie’s hold, sliding both hands into the front pocket of the hoodie. “I need to go and I don’t want you to get home late, it’ll make your dad mad.” Eddie’s voice cracked slightly. “I’ll see you tomorrow Richie.” 

Eddie gives him a small chaste kiss before turning around and walking away.

Richie wants to go after him. He wants to pull Eddie into his arms and apologize for being so scared. He wants to tell Eddie that he loves him and kiss him till the other boy can feel how much Richie loves him. He wants to tell Eddie that he doesn’t care about what his dad thinks and finally hold Eddie’s hand in the hallway and show off for the world to see that _Eddie Kaspbrak is my fucking boyfriend!_

But Richie doesn’t do that, instead he watches Eddie's retreating figure disappear around the corner because Richie Tozier does care what his dad thinks and he can’t kiss Eddie in front of people and he can’t hold Eddie’s hand in the hallways and show Eddie off as his boyfriend. He just _can’t_. 

The stadium lights finally shut off and Richie is engulfed in darkness. 

+

Richie remembers the first time that he saw Eddie Kaspbrak. 

Word has been floating around for a few days about a new boy that was coming all the way from Florida. The majority of kids that lived in Derry have barely stepped foot out of the town, let alone out of the state, so it was quite a newsworthy topic to talk about in the halls of Derry High. When the day finally came of the boy’s first day, everyone littered the hallways in hopes of spotting him first. But Richie didn’t get the chance of seeing him until the end of the day.

Richie had been hanging by the steps of the school when he saw Eddie. Richie had one earbud lodged into his ear, the wind whipping his hair back, and a windbreaker wrapped tightly around his hoodie, as he was waiting for Stan Uris to come out and give him a book for their English class. 

A boy walked out from inside the school, humming along to a tune of a song. Richie’s head snapped back and locked eyes with him, immediately captured by the boy.

There was something about him. In the way that he dressed and held himself, complete with his warm eyes and the bright smile that he shot Richie’s way. Richie had made eye contact with him, neither of them looking away until the boy had walked past him. 

Stan finally arrived, mumbling about how much he hated the cold, and handed Richie the book. Richie barely looked at Stan, trying to find where Eddie went, spotting him in the school parking lot. 

“What are you looking for?” Stan asked as he rubbed his mitten-clad hands together. Richie swallowed, shifting his gaze to Stan. 

“Nothing.” 

+

Eddie was ignoring him and Richie knows this fact because of his twenty calls and thirty text messages that went unanswered. He could also tell by how Eddie never turned around once to look at him in any class that they had together and the cold look that Richie received from Bill Denbrough in English. (Bill was Eddie’s best friend and the only person that knows about Richie and Eddie dating.) 

Richie spots Eddie coming out from his math class with Bill in tow. They seemed to be having a conversation but stopped when Eddie saw Richie at his locker. Richie sheepishly waves at his boyfriend. Eddie says something to Bill and the boy nods, pulling Eddie into a hug. Bill makes eye contact with Richie, a warning, before turning his heel and heading towards the front doors of the school. 

“Hey shortcake.” Richie says, standing upright. 

Eddie gives him an annoyed look. “If this is the start of you apologizing, you are not doing so hot.” 

Richie clears his throat as he stands up straighter. He leans closer to his boyfriend, the smell of lavender wafts into his nose. “I’m sorry.” Richie says and Eddie stayed silent as he put the combination into his locker. “You look very beautiful today. I love seeing you in my clothes.” Eddie was wearing another of Richie’s sweaters. It was a green one this time and was one of Eddie’s favourites to wear because of how threadbare the fabric was. The collar of the sweater dipped low, exposing Eddie’s collarbones and a small portion of the fading marks that Richie had placed there four days prior. 

“Is it yours, hm, I didn’t notice.” Eddie said, finally turning away from his locker to glare at his boyfriend. “And I look beautiful everyday.” There was a hint of humour in his tone. 

Richie grins at Eddie’s response. “Of course, baby.” He had gotten more out of Eddie in the past five minutes than he has in the past two days. 

Eddie looks like he was trying to suppress a grin before turning back to his locker and took the lock off, swinging the door open. A large stuffed monkey fell out from having been stuffed in his locker very poorly and landed at Eddie’s feet, 

“Surprise baby!” Richie cheers, waving his hands by his side. “I know that monkeys are your favourite animals and since I can’t get you a real one, Cornealius here will have to suffice.” 

That was one of the first facts that he had learned about Eddie, that the smaller boy had a weird obsession with monkeys. Eddie had an abundance of random baby monkey videos on his phone to prove it.

Eddie bends down to pick up the blue stuffed monkey, cradling it close to his chest. “That is a horrible name to give a monkey.” He scolds as he starts for his backpack that was hung up in his locker but before he can grab it, Richie takes it and slings it on his shoulder. 

“You’re gonna hurt ol’ Corney’s feelings by saying that Eds.” Richie says as Eddie shuts his locker and begins to walk in front of him. He doesn’t miss the start of a smile tugging on the corners of Eddie’s lips. 

Eddie is still walking ahead of him as they push through the front doors of the school, “You already hurt his feelings by naming him fucking Cornealius.” 

“You wound me Eddie-Spaghetti.” Eddie looks over his shoulder and Richie sends a smirk and wink his way. 

Eddie rolls his eyes in amusement before turning back around. The small amount of snow that still covered the ground crunched underneath their feet as they made their way to the parking lot. The weather was nice, it was sunny with barely any wind. Richie widens his strides, catching up to Eddie. Silence surrounds them as they walk side by side. Eddie was still clutching Cornelius close to his chest making Richie smile softly to himself as he stared down at the boy. 

Eddie glanced up at Richie, seeing him staring at him with _that_ look. Eddie looks away, his lips forming a tight line, making Richie’s smile shrink just a tiny bit. 

They reached Eddie’s car, it was his aunt’s old Honda that needed maintenance every week. The car could barely start without wanting to break down. The heater was broken and Eddie wasn’t able to drive it until waiting at least ten minutes after starting the car unless he wanted her to break down for good. Richie had begged Eddie to stop driving the damn death trap and just let Richie drive him but Eddie loved that car, claiming it had too many memories to just let get crushed in a junkyard. 

Richie placed Eddie’s backpack into the back seat before climbing into the passenger side of the car. “I’m still mad at you.” Eddie says finally as he gets into the driver’s side, “I cannot believe you forgot about our date.” 

“I accidentally fell asleep and plus I went to your house as soon as I woke up.” Richie said as he watched Eddie turn the car on, it sputtered a few times before roaring to life. “ I know you aren’t actually mad at me, baby. You can never be mad at me.” 

“That is an awfully strong statement. Are you sure about that Tozier?” Eddie says, turning in his seat to face Richie. Richie leans on the middle console of the car, resting his chin onto the palm of his hand. 

“You love me too much to stay mad at me, baby.” Richie grinned, leaning up to Eddie’s face. “Don’t you?” Richie could hear Eddie’s breath hitch just a tiny bit from their closeness. 

“Tell me you love me Eddie.” Richie says as he grips Eddie’s chin between his thumb and pointer finger. “Because you aren’t mad at me. Because you want to kiss me but I’m not gonna kiss you ‘til you tell me that you love me, sweetheart.” 

Eddie closed his eyes and took a sharp inhale. He could feel Richie’s stare on his face, making him hot all over. Eddie loved how Richie spoke to him, knowing exactly what to say and how to say it to make Eddie feel fuzzy in the head. “I love you.” Eddie breathed out, opening his eyes again. 

“You’re gonna have to say that a little louder baby, I couldn’t hear ya.” Richie said, pulling Eddie closer to him by the chin. 

Eddie inhaled another breath. He could feel himself getting more turned on by Richie’s tone and actions. He really really wanted to kiss Richie. “I love you.” Eddie said a bit louder. 

Richie smiled wickedly as he leaned back in his seat, chuckling at Eddie’s confused expression. “C’mere shortcake.” Richie says, patting his thighs twice. Eddie didn’t need to be told again. He quickly scrambled across the seat, settling himself down on Richie’s lap before bringing their lips together.

Their lips moved together feverishly, hands roaming each other’s clothed bodies, the sound of their kissing filled the air. It didn’t take long before Eddie started grinding himself down onto Richie whose dick was hardening in his soccer shorts. Needy moans escaped Eddie's mouth when he felt the pressure of Richie’s hard on sliding between his ass through the material of their pants. 

“D-don’t you have p-practice?” Eddie pants against Richie’s lips. He stops his movements, making Richie grunt and thrust his hips upwards. Eddie let out a moan.

“Yeah, but you got me all hot and bothered, baby. I can’t exactly play soccer with a boner now can I?” Richie says before kissing down the column of Eddie’s neck, sucking on the soft skin above his collarbone. “So what’cha gonna do about it, sugar?” 

Eddie lets out a loud whine, scooting himself backward in Richie’s lap so that there was room between them before reaching down and pulling Richie’s cock out from the shorts. He quickly spits into his hand before wrapping it around Richie’s girth, giving him a few pumps.

Richie grips at Eddie’s thighs tightly, moaning loudly as Eddie’s small hands run expertly up and down his length. “Fuck kitten.” Richie groans, “Getting daddy off so well sweetheart, love to please me don’t you.” 

Eddie moans at the praise, leaning in to Richie and brought their lips back together messily as he quickened his movements. “Gonna make you lick yourself clean of my come before I leave.” Richie says, parting their lips again, “Such a good pet for me aren't you.” 

Eddie moans again at the praise, he presses his own palm against his hard on, rolling his hips to provide stimulation for his painfully hard cock. 

Richie dips his head to Eddie’s neck, sucking and biting into the soft skin. He loved how sensitive Eddie’s neck was, how easy Eddie turns into a moaning mess from Richie giving him hickies. Eddie’s movements became more sloppy from Richie sucking pretty bruises on his neck, his grip faltering from time to time but all it took was Eddie moaning Richie’s name as he slid his thumb over the tip of Richie’s dick to make him come, spilling onto Eddie’s hand. Richie pants against the skin of Eddie’s shoulder, closing his eyes from the feeling of Eddie giving him a few pumps before tucking his dick back into his shorts with his clean hand. 

“I wasn’t kidding when I said I wanted to see you clean yourself before I left, sugar.” Richie said, leaning his head back onto the headrest of the seat, drinking in the sight of the smaller boy that was on his lap. Eddie looked properly fucked out, his big eyes were glassy and his pupils were blown with want. His face was tinted pink from arousal and his lips swollen and raw from Richie biting and tugging on them. Richie looked smugly at the several marks on Eddie’s neck that he wouldn’t be able to hide but there were also some that lined his collarbones, which he could hide more easily. Not to mention the wet patch that was beginning to show through the material of his pants.

Eddie’s cheeks darkened at Richie’s words. But Richie knew his boy wasn’t as shy as he was acting. “C’mon kitten, feed yourself with my milk like the good little pet that I know you are.” Richie edged, “Give daddy a show.” 

Eddie’s eyes rolled back and fluttered shut as he shyly brought his come-covered hand up to his mouth, his tongue darting out and scooped up a small section with the tip of his tongue. Eddie let out a quiet moan, licking up more of Richie’s spunk onto his tongue. He could feel Richie’s heavy stare on him as he continued to lap up the substance on his hand, letting himself savour the flavour of _Richie_. He took one long final lick from the come that dripped down his arm, letting the drop sit on his tongue. He fluttered his eyes up to Richie’s, seeing his boyfriend stare intently at his open mouth with his bottom lip caught tight between his teeth and lust-blown eyes.

Eddie brought his clean hand up and cupped Richie’s face, coaxing his lip free before crushing their lips together. Richie moaned loudly into Eddie’s mouth, tasting himself on his boyfriend's tongue. Richie brought his hands up to Eddie’s jaw, cradling his face to kiss the boy deeper but before he could bring their lips together again, Eddie pulled away.

“Wha-” 

“You need to get to practice.” Eddie interrupted as he quickly got off of Richie’s lap and back into the driver's seat. Eddie pulls out a packet of wet wipes from the middle console and a bottle of hand sanitizer. He begins to wipe his hands down before squirting a bit of sanitizer on his palms, rubbing the substance in. _God,_ Richie was in love with this boy. 

Richie stared at his boyfriend in disbelief, not knowing how to react. How can someone go from being so pliant and willing to being such a little tease in a span of a few minutes?

“Eds what?” Richie finally said, turning his whole body to face his boyfriend. “What do you mean ‘you need to get to practice’” 

Eddie rolled his eyes with a smug smile on his lips, “Exactly what I said! Coach Tozier isn’t gonna be very pleased if his star player isn’t there.” 

“ _Coach Tozier_ isn’t gonna give two fucks whether I’m there or not.” Richie scoffs, “Plus he told me not to bother showing up on the field until I sort out my shit. Apparently I haven’t been playing properly and he’s pissed over it.” 

“And you think that spending time with me, instead of practising soccer, is gonna help you get your shit together?” Eddie quirks an eyebrow. “That makes so much sense.” 

Richie lets out a laugh. “I think going home with my boyfriend for some much needed sexy time will help me sort everything out.” Richie wiggles his eyebrows seductively at Eddie who whacks him lightly on the chest, his face turning a light shade of red. 

“Are you sure Coach Tozier is going to be okay with that solution?” Eddie teases, tracing the collar of Richie’s hoodie with his finger. Richie feels himself turning hot all over from the simple touch. 

Richie breath hitches in his throat, staring at the boy across from him. The boy with the golden skin that was always so soft with light brown flecks that scattered all throughout his body that Richie wanted to map out. Richie scoots as close to Eddie as the car allowed, lacing their fingers together. He wants to pull Eddie closer and closer to him, to keep him in his arms and shielded from the world. Maybe they can run away together, away from this small town, away from Richie’s dad. 

Running away. It’s something that he has thought about often. Just him and Eddie, in Richie’s car because they both know Eddie’s would break down the moment they started her up. They can move somewhere warm, so that Eddie’s freckles can never fade but spread throughout his carmel skin. They can start out living in a shitty apartment where the roof leaks when it rains too hard and where the refrigerator light can never be turned on no matter how many times they change the light bulb. They will have a mattress on the floor (because they can’t afford a bed frame) with a billion blankets so that they won’t get cold during the night. 

There will be pictures of them on the walls and every nook and cranny will have a piece of _them_ in it. Richie will awake every morning and go to sleep every night with Eddie in his arms. Richie will be able to dance with Eddie in the middle of the living room as they listen to cheesy love songs and they will be able to cook food in their own kitchen and have late-night talks in their own dining room when they can’t sleep. They will be able to kiss and laugh and fight and have sex in their own space. A space where they don’t have to hide, where they wouldn’t have to be afraid. 

Where Richie wouldn’t have to be afraid.

“ _Coach Tozier_ ,” his name is uttered out of Richie’s mouth bitterly, “can fuck off.” 

Eddie smiles. The kind of smile that shows off both rows of his white teeth, causing cute little crinkles to form in the corners of his eyes and a small dimple to indent onto his left cheek. It’s the kind of smile that brightens up Richie’s mood and the type of smile that he hopes he never stops seeing. 

“I guess he can.” Eddie says as he leans over the middle compartment, capturing Richie’s lips in a kiss. They fall together easily, of course they do. Richie’s hands find Eddie’s cheeks as Eddie grips at his biceps. 

“This is what’s gonna happen.” Eddie states when they pull away, “You’re gonna get out of my car and go to practice. And tonight when you come over, I’ll help you get your _shit_ all sorted out.” 

Richie smirks, “How are you planning to do that, princess?”

Eddie pretends to think for a few seconds, “I guess you’ll have to come over and find out won’t you.”

Richie climbs out the car, leaning up against the opened door. “Of course my love.” 

Eddie grins at him before telling him to close the car door. Richie grants Eddie’s request but motions for Eddie to roll down the passenger window. 

“I love you. Text me when you’re home safe, okay?” Richie says as he watches Eddie buckle himself in. He takes a step back from the car. 

“Yeah yeah. Get your flat ass to practice.” Eddie says as he peels out from his parking spot and starts driving away. As Eddie makes a turn, he sticks his head out the window, his words were probably heard all the way from the soccer field, “I love you too dick!” 

Richie chuckles, looking up at the sky. The smile stretches across his face so big that it hurts. He makes his way to the field. During practice, he gives it his all. And it’s definitely not because he was thinking about dancing with a certain boy in the middle of a shitty apartment the whole time. Definitely not. 

And that night when he showed up in Eddie’s room, the boy made good on his promise and sorted Richie out no problem.

+

Richie can’t really remember a time where he cared so much for someone until Eddie. He loves everything about him, from the way he always insists on wearing Richie’s sweaty soccer jersey after every game (which usually ends up with Richie fucking him in nothing but said jersey) to the way he always wears socks to sleep (even though he always toes them off during the night). His persistence to always drink his milkshakes too fast and gets a stomach ache to the way he is always writing weird little notes and leaving them in Richie’s backpack. He loves Eddie Kaspbrak more than he has loved anything in his life. 

He draws stupid ‘R + E’s’in his notebooks. He gives half his wardrobe to Eddie because he loves the sight of his boyfriend drowning in his worn tee shirts. He lets Eddie drive him around in his shitty car that is one ride closer to collapsing on the road because he loves how carefree Eddie is when he’s driving. 

He feels like he’s floating every time he thinks about Eddie and drunk every time he’s touching him. He tries to pay more attention in class so that he can help Eddie if he needs it (even though Eddie probably doesn’t need his help). He is close to Eddie’s aunt, Florence, Eddie beaming every time he catches Richie and his aunt laughing and joking together. 

He wants to press Eddie against the lockers and kiss him silly. He wants to show their relationship off when they walk down the hallway. He wants to run up to the bleachers during a soccer game and kiss Eddie breathless every time Derry High wins a game. But he can’t. Instead, he sticks to writing their names together in his notebooks and sending secret winks and mouthed ‘I love you’s’ to Eddie during class and kissing in the darkness of empty classrooms.

Richie Tozier fell in love. Hard. With a boy. And no one seemed to notice. 

+

Eddie Kaspbrak could understand the relationship of a complicated family. 

His father had passed away when he was just 2 years old and his mother grew to be controlling and manipulative. She would give him pills and a fake inhaler filled with sugar water, convincing her son that he was sick. She took him to doctor visits so frequently that he knew every single staff member in the hospital. At first, he actually thought he was sick, he stayed indoors in fear of breathing in dirty air and infecting his fragile lungs. He wiped down every surface before anything else, he popped his pills like they were his life line, because in his mind, they were. 

It wasn’t until the age of twelve that he found out the truth. The placebos. The fake doctors notes. The manipulation. Everything. It took everything that he knew and flipped it upside down. Something broke in him that day. He confronted his mother, screaming like a banshee and crying until his face was a bright red. _You lied to me! I was never sick! I fucking hate you!_ His mother slapped him for the first time that day, her hand whipped down against his cheek, knocking his tiny body to the ground. He felt a ringing in his ears and his whole body froze as he stared up at her. Shocked and angry.

She crouched down next to him, letting her hot breath waft on his face, _I am your mother Eddie-bear. And that is not how you treat your mother._ She dragged him up by the arm. _Now, you are going to be a good boy for mama and do not speak a word of this to anyone. You are my good boy and you make sure that everyone sees you that way. Do you understand Edward?_

Their mother-son relationship changed drastically that day. In private, they would barely talk to each other, Eddie did whatever he wanted and Sonia didn’t bat an eye. Their public relationship was something else. It was more of a show than anything. And the characters were the widowed Sonia Kaspbrak and her perfect son. All the families in their Florida town doted on the mother and son at every party that they would attend and hosted.

When he turned fifteen, Eddie had discovered this certain magazine under the bleachers of the football field. This magazine was filled with raunchy photographs of half-naked male models, with their tan skin slicked with oils and underwear so tiny and tight that it left little to the imagination. He felt his chest tighten and his stomach flip, this men's magazine made him feel something that no other porno magazine - the ones that showed off those pretty girls in their tight short shorts and tits that were held inside their skimpy shirts by one button - ever did. He went home that day with the magazine tucked safely inside his backpack, pulling it out before bed and flipped through the pictures. He drank in every detail from their bulging biceps and chiseled chins and tiny speedos that did nothing to hide their most private parts. 

The pictures made Eddie’s mouth water. He felt himself harden in his pants at each flip of the page. He grew hot, feeling the blush spread to each crevice of his body. He quickly shut the magazine and got up to lock the door before crawling back into bed. He stripped off his clothes and threw them somewhere in his room. He stared down at himself, his lower half no longer covered by any clothing. He squirted lotion onto his hand before wrapping it around himself, pumping himself lightly.

He closed his eyes and imagined that one of the men from the magazine was here with him. He imagined their oil-slicked body being pressed against his, spreading the oil onto his skin. He imagined kissing them, feeling the pressure of someone else’s lips pressed against his own. He pressed two fingers against his most private part, getting lost in the euphoric feeling as he neared his climax.

He came hard that night, harder than any other time he’s ever touched himself, his thighs shaking violently and his bottom lip bleeding from how hard he was biting down on it. It felt like a veil had been lifted, that night was when Eddie realized he was gay and his life changed even more.

Eddie was stirring the straw of his cherry coke, smiling politely at the handsome son of his mother's friend from the country club. Alex, the boy, gave him a knowing smirk as he swallowed down the last of his drink. Eddie couldn’t help but stare at the way his throat bobbed. 

“These parties get more and more lame as time goes on doesn’t it?” Alex says, setting his drink down, “But mother keeps insisting I come, it makes the family look better apparently.” 

Eddie nods knowingly. He takes a long drink from his straw, hollowing his cheeks a bit more than necessary as he slowly drags his gaze up to Alex’s face. He was already staring at Eddie with his bottom lip sucked between his teeth. “I happen to think these parties can get more… _exciting_ as time passes.” Eddie says, flashing him an innocent smile.

Alex hums in response. He continues to stare at Eddie, drinking in the sight of the boy in front of him. “Maybe we should go somewhere more private. I’m sure we can have some fun with just the two of us, yeah?” 

Eddie sits back in his seat. He runs his tongue across his bottom lip, watching as Alex’s eyes track his movements. “Lead the way handsome.” 

Eddie ends up bent over the counter in the bathroom as Alex thrusts into him with a tight grip around his throat. 

Eddie could recall many more of these stories from when he was just 16 years old. Bathroom blowjobs. Quick fucks in empty rooms. He didn’t need to do much. With one simple look, the bat of his eyelashes, an innocent smile, a lingering touch of his hand was all it took. 

Eddie questioned himself sometimes, wondered why he fooled around with so many people. Maybe it was because he wanted his mother to see. Maybe he wanted her to know that she can’t control him anymore. An act of rebellion against a woman that had controlled his life for so long. 

When he was seventeen, his mother had passed. _Natural causes._ Of course he was upset, she was still his mother, despite it all. But deep inside, he felt it, the feeling of elation. _He was finally free._ Eddie went to go live with his Aunt Florence in the small town of Derry, Maine, which was a long ways away from Florida, but Eddie itched to get out of this town. 

He had always loved his Aunt Florence, she was his father's sister who came down to visit once every year since his father’s death. She and his mother never really got along which was probably another reason why Eddie loved his aunt as much as he did. Florence knew him better than his own mother did and she certainly loved him more than his mother. She cared for him like Sonia Kaspbrak should have. So moving in with her was a dream. The fresh start that he craved for. 

Eddie was good at making friends - a skill that both came natural to him and was further developed throughout the years of playing a role for his mother. For a moment, he was afraid, what new kid wasn’t, but he knew that he would be just fine. He had been the talk of the small town even before he stepped foot into Derry so it didn't take much on his part to have them eating from the palm of his hand. 

+

Richie’s father had never liked Eddie. 

From the very first time that he met him, Mr. Tozier didn’t approve of Richie’s and Eddie’s friendship. 

The first time Wentworth Tozier found out about their friendship he had come home and saw his son and the new boy in town sitting on Richie’s bed doing their homework together. Now, Wentworth didn’t care that his son had friends over, never has. But this new boy, Edward Kaspbrak, had many rumours about him going around. 

_I heard that Florence’s nephew is a little fairy._

Wentworth had heard that rumour the very first day that Eddie moved into town and as time went on, he continued to hear more and more, each one getting more absurd. 

_I heard that that Kaspbrak kid only moved here because he got caught having sex with his male teacher._

_You know that fag? Eddie? I heard he was giving blowjobs to some boys down in the Barrens for five dollars each._

_I heard his ma died because she had a heart attack after seeing him take it in the ass by an older man. Fucking fairy._

He never listened to them until he actually saw this Kaspbrak kid for himself. _This kid is a fag alright._

Eddie had stayed for dinner that first night Wentworth met him because Maggie Tozier insisted. He sat in the chair between Richie and Wentworth, across from Richie’s 9 year old sister, Aimee.

After Eddie had left and Aimee and Richie had gone to sleep, Wentworth and Maggie were in the kitchen, speaking in hushed voices. Wentworth was angry, his tone becoming louder with every word, while Maggie tried to quiet him down. 

_I don’t want that fucking faggot in my house._ Wentworth was leaning up against the counter with his arms folded and a furrowed eyebrow. He was already tipsy on the few beers he drank during and after dinner. 

_I don’t want him talking to Aimee or near her._ He stopped for a breath, _And I certainly don’t want him anywhere near Richie. There is no way my son is going to hang with some girly boy._

Little did he know, Richie had heard every single word that was spoken and was fuming, _how dare he say those things about Eddie?_ Richie never wanted to stop being around Eddie, more so now after hearing what his father said. So Richie began to bring Eddie around more after that night, they would do homework together on Richie’s bed with the door closed, no matter how many times his father would come barging in. He would beg Eddie to stay for dinner, feeling a sense of joy whenever he saw his father’s stiff posture and permanent frown. _Look at me dad. Look at me, you can’t fucking control me._

Richie knew that Wentworth Tozier didn’t like Eddie then and he certainly never warmed up to Eddie. Eddie was currently sitting in the living room, playing dress up with Aimee. He was trying to stifle his laughs as she tried to paint his nails. But the polish was getting everywhere.

His father was in the kitchen and Richie knew that he could see everything. He could see Eddie expertly applying makeup on Aimee and painting her nails. He could see Richie sitting against the couch, watching the both of them with a dopey smile on his lips. 

“Richieeee. Stop it!” Aimee whines, “You keep looking at Eddie funny.” Aimee wrinkles her nose as she glares at Richie. 

Eddie lets out a loud laugh. “Why do you think he’s looking at me like that Aims?” He whispers to her, shielding his lips from Richie’s view as if that was going to keep Richie from hearing. 

Aimee starts stroking her chin, as if she was deep in thought before answering, “I don’t really know, maybe ‘cause you’re painting your nails?” 

Richie watches as Eddie leans back in the little plastic chair, “Huh, maybe Richie’s jealous that my nails are prettier than his.” 

Aimee tilts her head and squints her eyes at Eddie, “Well duh! Richie always has dirt under his nails. I think boys would be so much prettier if they painted their nails like you.” She nods after she says it, “I think you are the prettiest boy in the world Eddie-spaghetti!” 

Eddie’s cheeks flush, he pulls Aimee into his lap, blowing a raspberry into her neck. She lets out a squeal, laughing loudly. “Awe sweetie! You’re making me blush.” 

  
“Don’t you think Eddie is the prettiest boy in the whole wide world, Richie?” Aimee asks, squishing Eddie’s face between her tiny hands, facing her brother. Richie’s eyes widened. _Of course. He is my pretty boy._ He could feel Eddie’s piercing stare and see the cute, smug smile that was tugging on his lips. 

There was a loud cough from the kitchen making the three turn their heads towards Wentworth who was now standing in the doorway with a deep frown on his lips. “Kids, it’s time to set the table for dinner.” Wentworth ordered Richie and Aimee before looking towards Eddie. “Edward I think it’s time for you to head home.” 

Aimee grunted, hopping out of Eddie’s lap to run to her dad, “Daddy can Eddie please stay here for dinner? Pleaseeee?” 

Wentworth shook his head, “Sorry kiddo, Eddie has to go home.” 

“Dad!” Aimee whines again. Richie gets off the floor, ready to argue with his father about not letting Eddie stay when Eddie stands up from the toy table. 

“It’s okay Aims, I really do need to get going.” Eddie smiles politely before packing up his things. “We can play more next time okay honey?” 

Aimee nods, sadly agreeing to let Eddie go home, but not before running back over and giving him a hug and kiss on the cheek. “Okay… Next time I want to paint your nails purple!” 

“Deal.” Eddie smiles, “Thank you again for letting me come over, Mr. Tozier.” 

Wentworth only turns away and walks back into the kitchen which makes Richie want to scream at his father for being like this.

“C’mon, I’ll walk you out.” Richie takes Eddie’s hand in his before quickly leading them out the door. Richie shuts it loudly behind him, allowing himself to let out the frustrated sigh he was keeping in. 

“I’m sorry.” is the first thing out of Richie’s mouth. 

Eddie looks up at Richie, shaking his head. “Baby, you have nothing to be sorry for.” 

“Yes I do!” Richie exclaims as he runs his fingers through his hair. “Because my father is always acting like a fucking dick to you and I can’t do a damn thing about it!” 

Eddie lets go of Richie’s hand and a rise of panic surges through Richie’s body. _No no no, don’t leave me._ But he relaxes when he feels Eddie wrapping his arms around his torso, nuzzling his cheek against Richie’s chest. Richie lets himself wrap his arms around Eddie, pulling his boyfriends body closer to his. 

“I can take it Rich.” He hears Eddie mumble, “Please don’t be sorry.” 

Richie lets out another breath, “But I-” 

Eddie pulls away from Richie’s chest to look up at his boyfriend. “Stop it. You have nothing to be sorry about so I don’t want to hear it.” He goes up onto his tippy-toes to plant a kiss on Richie's cheek before allowing himself to step away from the embrace, but Richie doesn’t want him to go, not just yet. He pulls Eddie back into his arms, causing a laugh to erupt from Eddie. 

“Rich! I have to get going or Florence is going to grill me again for being late.” Eddie says, squirming in Richie’s embrace. 

Richie sighs as he nuzzles his face into Eddie’s soft hair, pulling his boyfriends body impossibly closer to his. “Just a few more minutes, wanna hold you.” 

“Clingy much?” Eddie teases but he easily gives in, wrapping his arms around Richie’s torso again. 

There was no other place either boy wanted to be. 

+

Richie always comes to Eddie’s door at exactly 10:50pm. Thirty minutes after Wentworth Tozier went to bed. Eddie always has the door unlocked and Richie, as graceful as ever, climbs up the trellis right next to Eddie’s balcony and walks through the door. 

Eddie was already in bed that day, curled up underneath his baby pink duvet with his nose buried in a thick book. He had his cute reading glasses on, the ones that he was too embarrassed to be seen with so he only wore them in the comfort of his bedroom or when he’s with his aunt or Richie (or Bill but Richie didn’t want to talk about that). The bedside lamp was the only light illuminating the space, casting a warm yellow glow throughout the room. 

Richie quietly walks over to the bed, toeing off his shoes before sliding beside Eddie under the blanket. He burrows his way underneath Eddie’s arm to lay against his chest and wraps his arm around Eddie’s torso. 

“Well hello to you too.” Eddie says, still very engrossed in his book. Richie feels a kiss being placed on the top of his head.

“I missed you.” Richie responds, burying his face into Eddie’s clothed chest. Letting the soft smell of laundry detergent relax him. 

Eddie dog-ears the page he was on, closing the book and places it on his night stand. He traces the tip of his finger down Richie’s forehead and the slope of his nose. “We saw each other yesterday.” 

Richie shakes his head, “Way too long to be without you next to me.” 

Eddie hums. He leans down and places a kiss against Richie’s forehead, his fingers gently massaging Richie’s scalp. 

Richie closes his eyes, “I have a present for you.” 

Eddie’s fingers stopped their movements, a noise of confusion escaped him. Richie looks up at Eddie with a playful smile on his face, he reaches a hand into his sweats and pulls out a black tube, holding it in front of Eddie’s face and watches the boy’s reaction. 

Eddie stares at the object in confusion before his lips take form into an ‘O’ shape, realizing what the item Richie was holding was. “Is that-?”

Richie nods, sitting up. “Bevvy got it for you.” He says popping open the cap, “It’s that deep red shade you like too.” He twists the bottom of the tube to reveal the product. “Can I put it on you?” 

Eddie stares at the tube before looking up at Richie. He leans in and places a deep kiss on Richie’s lips, his hands coming up to cup his jaw. “Of course baby.” Eddie whispers against his lips before pulling away, “Pretty me up, sun!” 

Richie rolls his eyes, a smile tugging on his lips. “You’re already pretty, Eds. My gorgeous boy.” He holds Eddie’s chin between his fingers, pulling him closer. He presses the end of the lipstick against Eddie’s plump bottom lip, swiping it across the pink flesh until the red coats the surface before moving to do the top lip. It was a bit messy from Richie’s inexperienced hand but it looked good nonetheless. Eddie smacked his lips, rubbing in the lipstick so it blended together. 

Richie felt like he couldn’t breath. Eddie looked like a fucking wet dream sitting there in just Richie’s tee shirt and wearing lipstick that made him look so sexy and staring at him with that innocent bambi look. _Fuck._ Richie was going to pop a boner. 

“Well, how do I look?” Eddie wonders, pursing his lips, “Aren’t I the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen?” 

Richie growls, smashing his lips to Eddie’s. He can feel how creamy the lipstick was as he licked the arch of Eddie’s top lip before pushing his tongue into his mouth. Eddie whimpers, fisting the material of Richie’s hoodie in his hands. 

“You’re the prettiest _boy_ I’ve ever seen.” Richie says as his lips make their journey down the column of Eddie’s neck, leaving behind a faint trail of red stains. He pulls Eddie into his lap, squeezing the soft flesh of his boyfriends curvy hips. “Not a girl.” 

“Hm.” Eddie hums, his hands travel under Richie’s shirt and scratch lightly at his abdomen. “I think your life would be much easier if I was a girl.” 

Richie pants, closing his eyes _._ Eddie continues, “You could take me home and introduce me to your parents, without any fear.” 

Richie looks at Eddie, “Your father would be happy that you got yourself a girlfriend.” Eddie places soft kisses on Richie’s face.

“We wouldn’t have to sneak around.” Eddie says, “You hold my hand in front of everyone.” 

Richie clenches his jaw. He doesn’t know if he’s angry or turned on by Eddie’s words. “Eddie.” He warns.

“I’d dress up just for you, like every other player's girlfriend.” Eddie giggles, his hands pulling off Richie’s shirt and hoodie, “You can kiss me after every win, like you’ve always wanted to.” 

Richie cups Eddie’s ass through his shorts, squeezing harshly at the plump flesh, eliciting a moan from his baby. “We can get married, becoming Mr. and Mrs. Tozier. We’d have the biggest wedding wouldn’t we,” Eddie whispers, kissing down Richie’s neck and across his collarbone, leaving a trail of red lips in its wake. “And when we move in together, I’d kiss you everyday before work and help you destress when you come home. I’d be such a good little housewife for you, baby. Your good girl.” 

Richie groans, pushing Eddie down on the mattress. “You are not being a good girl for me right now, princess.” Richie quickly rids Eddie of his shirt before capturing Eddie’s lips between his, swallowing the moans that he was letting out. Eddie’s legs spread, allowing Richie to settle between them. 

“I could carry our children.” Eddie goes on, his voice high and breathy. Richie groaned loudly, rutting his hard-on against the mattress. “We would have such a big family Rich. You’d keep me knocked up all the time, hmm?” 

“Shut the fuck up Eddie.” Richie growls, biting the soft flesh of Eddie’s neck. 

Richie shakes his head, he sits himself back on his calves. Eddie was a sight before him. The lipstick was smeared and there were faded lip marks littered down his neck and chest. He was panting, his chest rising up and down. Eddie was hard, his cock strained against his shorts that were no longer hidden by the tee shirt. Eddie’s pupils were blown and there was a look in them. A look that was only reserved for Richie. 

Richie reaches his hand out and pulls Eddie’s shorts off in one quick motion, drawing a gasp from Eddie. He runs his hands up Eddie’s hairless legs and gently squeezes the soft flesh of his inner thighs. One hand begins to ghost over the crack of Eddie’s ass before pushing against his hole. Eddie lets out a surprised moan, arching his back up deliciously. 

“You have been a bad girl.” Richie mutters, taking in Eddie’s dazed expression. He traces the rim with his finger before adding a bit of pressure but not to the point that his finger breached in. “I am going to mess you up, Eds.” 

Eddie squirms in Richie’s grasp, whimpering little noises that make Richie’s dick twitch in his pants. “Daddy, _please.”_ He tries to push down on Richie’s finger but Richie draws his hand away and lays a hard smack down on the left cleft of Eddie’s ass, watching hungrily as it jiggled. Eddie lets out a surprised yelp.

Richie holds Eddie’s ankles together with one hand, pushing his legs flush against his chest to get a better look at Eddie’s tight hole, watching it clench needily on nothing. 

“What do you want, princess?” Richie asks, looking back up at Eddie who was now near close to tears. “Use your words to tell daddy what you want.” 

“Da-ddy.” Eddie moans, trying to spread his legs again but Richie tightens his grip on Eddie’s ankles. A silent warning to stop and behave. “I wan’ your cock. Want you to fuck me.” 

“My pretty girl wants my cock in her pussy?” Richie whispers, tracing the rim of Eddie’s hole again. Eddie gasps at Richie words, because _Holy shit._ “You’re already soaking for me, leaking your sweet juices all over yourself, like a little slut. Always so fucking desperate for something in your pretty little cunt aren’t you.” 

Eddie moans, nodding rapidly. “ _Please.”_ Richie lets go of Eddie’s legs, letting the boy spread them so he can get between. Richie quickly gets up and rids himself of his sweats and grabs the bottle of lube in Eddie’s nightstand before getting between Eddie’s thighs. 

He pours the lube on his fingers and rubs them together before breaching Eddie’s wanting hole. He pushes a finger inside Eddie, who shudders and moans out Richie’s name. He has no thoughts in his head besides Richie’s finger pumping in and out of him and when the second finger enters him, he can barely register what was happening. 

“You doin’ okay sweet thing?” Richie asks as he moves up to give Eddie a kiss. Eddie dazely kisses back and gives him a small nod, fisting the bed spread tight in his hands. Richie places another kiss on his lips before adding a third finger. He quickly finds Eddie’s sweet spot, massaging the muscle with the pad of his fingers. Eddie lets out a surprised scream that is quickly quieted by Richie’s hand covering his mouth. 

“You need to be quiet, baby.” Richie warns, his fingers stopping their assault, “Can you be quiet?” 

Eddie nods and Richie takes his hand off of his mouth. “Want you inside, please.” 

Richie pumps his fingers a few more times before pulling them out. He pours more lube onto his hand, slicking himself up. “I’ll take care of you baby,” Richie coos as he pushes the head of his cock past Eddie's rim, he lets out a low groan at how Eddie’s hole seems to suck him in, “I’ll give you everything you want.” 

Richie presses forward and Eddie is floating on the feeling of Richie’s thick cock sliding inside him until Richie’s hips are flushed against his ass. Eddie squirms and clenches down deliciously on his cock trying to adjust to Richie’s girth and length. He feels the hand gripping his hip tighten. Richie moans out a _fuck_ and a _holy shit,_ and Eddie wraps his legs around his waist. 

“So fucking tight,” Richie groans, “Your little cunt was made for my cock, wasn’t it baby.”

“Only yours.” Eddie mumbles out, eyes squeezed shut. 

Richie’s hand caresses his face, coaxing him to look at him, “You’re doing so well. My good girl.” 

A dazed smile appears on Eddie’s lips, “Your good girl.” 

Richie grins, “Yes baby. Now open your eyes for me.” Richie runs a thumb across Eddie’s cheekbone, “I need you to look at me before I continue, shortcake.” 

Eddie nods before slowly opening his eyes, peering up at Richie. Richie groans at the sight, “Okay baby, I’m going to start moving now.” 

He waits for Eddie to nod before he starts to roll his hips. His moves are slow and calculated, hitting Eddie’s prostate with every thrust. Eddie feels drunk on the feeling of Richie’s cock fucking deep into him. Richie begins to quicken his pace and Eddie clings to him, clamping his teeth into the curve of Richie’s neck to suppress his sobs. 

Richie tries to go slower, to savour the feeling of being inside Eddie’s tight heat but how could he when Eddie was begging him to go _faster, harder._ His hips stutter, pushing against Eddie and fucking him deeper into the mattress. 

“Fuck sweetheart, holy fuck.” Richie mutters, “I’m gonna come. _Fuck.”_

Eddie suddenly arches his back off the bed, spilling his load between their bodies, coming untouched with his bottom lip clamped tight between his teeth to quieten his cries. And maybe it was the way Eddie looked, all blissed out from coming, or the delicious way that his hole clenched around him that pulled the orgasm from Richie. He spills his load into Eddie, rolling his hips slowly as they both come down from their highs. 

Richie wants to remember this. The whines that Eddie makes when Richie slowly pulls out of him. The protest that leaves Eddie’s lips when Richie suggests that Eddie should go to the bathroom to rid himself of Richie’s come, _I wanna be full with you all the time._ The kisses that Eddie presses everywhere on his face. He wants to remember the sweet _I love you’s_ that were mumbled against his bare skin. He wants to remember every single detail of Eddie Kaspbrak because this boy was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

“I have to get going.” Richie whispers into the darkness of the bedroom. It was a bit later in the night, the two boys were still naked (but clean) and tangled up in each other. Richie was laying on his back with Eddie draped on top of him. 

The finger that was tracing random shapes on his arm stopped. “I don’t want you to go.” Eddie says, his breath fanned over Richie’s skin and Richie can picture the cute pout on his lips. 

“It’s almost one in the morning and I have to be up at five to run.” Richie sighs. He feels Eddie shake his head, tightening his grip on Richie’s body. “Baby…” 

“Stay, please.” Eddie begs, “Just a few more minutes.” 

And Richie easily gives in. He could never resist the force that was Eddie Kaspbrak anyway. 

+

The first time Richie talked to Eddie was during a party. 

He was already on his second cup of whatever concoction he mixed together and he really needed a smoke. There were bodies everywhere, swaying together to shitty EDM music and Richie never wanted to leave more. But alas, he couldn’t, having given a promise to Beverly Marsh to stay the whole night and help her clean the next day. It was more of an ‘IOU’ type of promise that Richie wished he never agreed to because he could be at home, asleep right now if not for that. 

Richie pushed himself off the wall and finished the last of his drink, chucking it somewhere next to him. He makes his way through the crowd of sweaty bodies, not bothering to apologize for shoving people out the way. Richie somehow makes it through the mass and to the stairs, fumbling his way up the steps. He stumbles down the hall, grimacing at the sight of all the trash that he would have to clean up.It’s not until he turns down another hallway that he arrives at the room he always uses to get away. 

Richie stumbled into the room, closing the door behind him. The music became muffled behind the wood, which Richie was grateful for. He makes a quick bee-line for the bed, sighing in content as his body hits the soft foam. 

"Rough night?" A voice says, making Richie’s head snapped up and to the left towards the open window balcony doors. _Eddie fucking Kaspbrak._

“What are you doing here?” Richie winced as the words left his mouth. He didn’t intend for it to come out the way it did. _Rude and snotty._

Eddie quirked his eyebrows up with an amused expression, not fazed by Richie’s tone in the slightest. “Well hello to you too.” The moon shone down on Eddie, reflecting it’s beam on his skin. Richie couldn’t help but to stare. 

“I’m sorry," Richie explains, resting his cheek on his arm, “I didn’t expect anyone to be in here s’all.” 

“Ah I see, do you want me to leave?” Eddie asks. He turns his body towards Richie and motions to the door. Eddie was wearing a large flannel layered on top of a baby blue top with some words written across the chest, and a pair of black denim shorts. Richie couldn't help but linger on the sight of Eddie's slender tan legs and soft thighs.

Richie shook his head, “No, you don’t have to. I don’t mind.” and surprisingly he really didn’t. 

A cute smile appears on Eddie’s face, “I’m Eddie, by the way.” 

“I know.” comes out of Richie’s mouth before he can stop it. He feels himself flushing red as Eddie lets out a giggle. “Fuck, I didn’t - I’m Richie - I meant.” 

Eddie hums and walks towards the bed, sitting himself down on the side that Richie wasn’t sprawled across. He closes his eyes and leans his head back on the head board. “So, what is Richie Tozier doing in here instead of down there, partying?” Richie shifts his eyes up to look at Eddie’s face, feeling himself smiling. _Eddie knows who I am too._

Richie flips himself over, laying on his back to stare up at the ceiling fan. He was a bit closer to Eddie now, feeling the slight dip of the bed underneath his right shoulder. “Getting too crowded.” Richie replies, “Why are you not down there? Everyone is wanting to mingle with you, ya’know.”

“What is with this town and their interest in me.” Eddie groans, “I mean I understand that I’m new and all but what’s the deal? I’ve been here for a whole month.” 

Richie laughs because he understands. He knows exactly what Eddie is talking about, Richie is one of the most popular guys in Derry after all. “It’s a small town. Not a lot goes on around here so when something new happens, it’s all everyone is going to talk about for a while.” Richie hears Eddie let out a small groan again, “You still didn’t answer my question, why are you up here instead of down in the party?” 

Eddie shrugs, “Parties aren’t really my thing.” 

Richie lets out a snort, “Parties aren’t your thing.” He repeats, “So why are you here? At a party?” 

“Beverly Marsh can be very persuasive.” Eddie grins, “Plus I was promised free alcohol.” 

“Those are two very good reasons.” Richie laughs and Eddie laughs along before silence engulfs the two boys. Richie never got to just be silent with someone, all of his friends never sat around and did nothing with each other. There was always something to do, some place to see. Richie never got a second to breath. This was nice. 

Richie feels Eddie get up from the bed, his shoe-clad feet shuffling on the ground. 

“You’re leaving?” Richie asks. He sits up from the bed and stares at Eddie. He feels like his heart just dropped to his stomach, he didn’t want Eddie to leave. 

Eddie smiles at him, “The free alcohol calls for me Richie Tozier, who am I to ignore?” Eddie peels the black and blue flannel from his frame and tosses it on the bed.

“Are you coming back?” Richie can’t help the twing of hope that laced itself in his words. _Eddie wouldn’t leave his flannel if he was planning on not coming back. Right?_

Eddie’s eyebrows quirked up, “Of course.” He says, hands perched on the curves of his hips. “But I was hoping you would help me fend off the crowd of townsfolk that are hungry for my attention.” 

Eddie holds a hand out to him, waiting for Richie to take it. “Come on Richard. I am dubbing you as my knight and shining armour.” Eddie jokes, “Do you accept your role?” 

Richie stares at Eddie’s hand before looking up at his face. “Let’s get you that alcohol.” 

Richie takes Eddie’s hand in his, locking him in his role.

+

“We are going to get kidnapped.” 

“No we are not, now c’mon! We’re almost there.” 

Eddie stops in his tracks, wrapping his arms around himself. “I am not moving until you tell me where we are going!”

Richie groans, turning around before stomping back towards Eddie. “Don’t you trust me?” Richie asks. 

“I barely know you Richard Tozier,” Eddie says with a charming smirk, “For all I know, _you_ are the one that is going to kidnap me.” 

“Now I wouldn’t really be fulfilling my role of your knight and shining armour if I kidnapped you now would I?” Richie says, bowing his body and throwing his arms out to the side. “Come fair maiden, we are nearly at our location.” He holds a hand out for Eddie, still holding his bow. 

Eddie stifled a giggle but grabs hold of Richie’s hand, interlocking their fingers together. Richie tries to ignore the way his heart sped up and the heat that rushed to his ears as he gets back to his normal stance. 

Ever since a month ago, the night of the party, Eddie and Richie have been hanging out quite a bit. They had exchanged phone numbers and texted back and forth everyday weird pictures and jokes and just talked about nothing and everything at the same time. There were even some nights where they would speak on the phone until one of them, most always Eddie, would fall asleep. It was nice. 

He hears Eddie quietly humming along to some random song as he swings their hands lightly between them. Richie had snuck out that night and went to Eddie’s house in hopes of the boy going with him on a midnight adventure. Or at least that was what he told Eddie when he had asked why Richie was there. In reality, Richie just wanted to see Eddie but he couldn’t have just said that. So he made up some ‘midnight adventure’ bullshit and was figuring things out as they went along and somehow, he ended up leading them to the trail that went towards the Quarry. 

Eddie lets out a gasp when he sees where they were, letting go of Richie’s hand to run towards the edge of the rock. He looks down at the water below, glistening with the rays of the moon. Eddie has never seen anything quite as beautiful. 

He looks back and sees that Richie was staring at him with a soft look on his face. Eddie feels himself turn hot under the gaze. “This is awfully romantic Tozier.” Eddie teases as he walks back to where he left Richie. “Is this our first date or something?” 

“Oh this isn’t a date.” Richie says, looking down at Eddie. Eddie crosses his arms and cocks his head to the side.“If it was, I would've asked you properly, not sneak you down your balcony. Get you presents or something. I definitely would’ve asked for your aunt’s permission beforehand.” 

“Ask for my aunts permission?” Eddie says, tilting his head back to look at Richie’s face. “Proper gentlemen are you?” 

Richie rolls his eyes in amusement, taking Eddie’s hand back in his and pulling him towards the edge to sit. The moon shined brightly, illuminating the water below with a majestic silver glow. 

Eddie sat, his tiny feet dangling off the edge, staring up at the moon. “It’s so beautiful.” 

“Ehh I’ve seen better.” Richie shrugs making Eddie’s head snap towards him. 

“Oh yeah?” Eddie challenges, “Now what would that be?” 

Richie gives him a big grin, raising his eyebrows and Eddie lets out a loud groan. The smaller boy shoves at his arm lightly, “You are such a fucking cliche Richie Tozier.” Eddie’s pink lips curled upwards as he shook his head. 

Richie swallowed and looked away, he couldn’t handle looking at Eddie for too long before he lost it and kisses him. “Would you want to go on a date with me?” 

Eddie faces Richie, he sucks in a sharp breath at the question. Richie leans in closer. He can feel a few strands of Eddie’s hair tickle his forehead. 

Eddie shakes his head. “Maybe...” He says as he breaks out into giggles. 

Richie couldn’t help but laugh along, “Why only maybe?” Eddie stands up and Richie follows. They are standing face to face, less than an inch of space between them. Richie reaches out and circles his hands around Eddie’s hips. 

“Because we barely know each other.” Eddie steps out of Richie’s hold, “And I am a traditional lady if anything.” Eddie turns and begins to walk away, “I need to know that you're not actually someone that wants to kill me and take my organs or something.” 

“Eddie Kaspbrak.” Richie calls after him, “You drive me mad.” 

Eddie turns back towards Richie, continuing his journey backwards, “Well one can never be to careful.” He gives shots Richie a smirk and wink. “Now, are you coming or not?” 

Richie shook his head with a grin and followed because of course he was coming. What a silly question.

+

They were in Richie’s room. It was two hours after school had ended. 

Eddie sounded so sweet and looked so lovely underneath Richie, his cheeks flushed with the prettiest shade of red and lips bitten raw. When they were at Richie’s house, they wouldn’t usually take their time for the fear that they would get caught, but this time Richie wanted to taste every single part of Eddie, to take him apart piece by piece until Eddie was crying for more.

So Richie did, taking Eddie apart with his tongue then his fingers. He played with the sensitive nubs of Eddie’s nipples and sucked pretty bruises onto his neck until Eddie cried and took Eddie’s hard cock into his mouth with three fingers stuffed in him until his boyfriend came, his body spasming and his face and neck wet with tears and Richie’s saliva. 

Now, he had Eddie folded in half, his slender legs perched on top of Richie’s shoulders and wrists held together above his head as Richie pounded mercilessly into his spent hole. He’s already been fucked well past sore by both Richie’s tongue and fingers and Richie knows how sensitive Eddie gets but his little baby is loving it, or else he would’ve used his safe word. 

Richie was riding on the high that was Eddie, basking himself in the loud, needy moans of his boyfriend that he didn’t hear the car door slamming shut or his father’s footsteps up the stairs or his bedroom door creaking open.

+

Richie has only ever had sex with one other person besides Eddie. It was his freshman girlfriend and he regretted it as soon as it was over. Not because he didn’t like it, he enjoyed it while it was happening, it was more of the fact that he wasn’t exactly 100% ready to be having sex. Maybe his hesitation showed in his performance in bed and maybe that was why his girlfriend broke up with him the following week. He could say that he was torn up about it but that would be a lie. 

He never really saw her around school as much after the whole break up which was weird because when they were dating, he saw her everywhere. And for the next three years, they never spoke to each other.

Until now at least. 

Because Richie shows up to school, four days after his father caught him and Eddie, with the girl, Lilith, under his arm. 

And when Eddie saw that, he felt the need to reach into his pocket for the sugar water filled inhaler for the first time in a long time. 

+

Bill Denbrough was someone that Richie had always envied. 

Bill was out and proud and didn’t give two shits to what anybody said about him. Bill, although proudly bisexual in a homophobic town, was pretty high up in the social hierarchy. He was captain of the baseball team, president of a bunch of clubs that Richie barely knew the school had, and was pretty popular among the student body. 

But being one of the few people that were out in Derry presented Bill with a large target on his back. Many adults disapprove of him, a lot of the kids feel like it’s okay to pick on him or even beat him up sometimes. But Bill Denbrough never let any of that get to him. He holds his head up high and never says anything.

Richie envies Bill because he is the type of person Richie wishes that he could be. He wishes that he could stand up to everyone and not be afraid of what others think of him. 

Everybody knows that Bill doesn’t really have close friends, the boy would rather kick it alone with his old sketchbook that he always seems to be carrying around than actual people. So when Bill Denbrough and Eddie Kaspbrak show up to school together, two weeks after Eddie arrived in Derry, laughing and talking like they’ve been friends for years, everyone was pretty shocked.

Richie was confused, and maybe a bit jealous (not that he knew he was jealous), that out of all the people Eddie Kaspbrak decided to become best friends with, he chose Bill Denbrough.

Everywhere that Bill was, Eddie was with him. They would walk close together during passing periods and eat lunch outside together. They would whisper to each other during class and giggle at stupid inside jokes. Bill would even draw Eddie, his sketchbook filling up with just random sketches of the smaller boy. 

Richie would feel annoyance seeping out of his body every time he would catch Bill and Eddie together, smiling and touching. Because Bill Denbrough plays with Eddie’s hair and he holds Eddie’s hands and hugs Eddie and always seems to have one arm around the smaller boy at all times. As if they were dating or something. Richie found it so fucking irritating. Especially after Eddie and Richie got together.

He hated how close Bill and Eddie were before and he definitely still hated it now. 

Richie opens his locker and collects his books. His body ached and the fading bruise on his cheek throbbed horribly. He just wanted to get the school day and soccer practice over with so he could just go home and go to sleep. He shuts his locker to only have fucking Bill Denbrough’s annoying face inches away from his. 

Richie gasps, his hand flying to his chest, “Holy shit.” He feels his heart hammering against his chest. “What the fuck are you doing Denbrough?” 

Bill rolls his eyes at Richie, leaning up against the lockers. He looked angry and annoyed to be there as if he wasn’t the one that came to Richie in the first place. “What the fuck are _you_ doing Tozier?” 

Richie tightens his grip on his backpack strap, moving his body so he stood taller than the other boy. “The hell are you pressed about.” 

Bill rolls his eyes again, crossing his arms and Richie is so tempted to just punch him in the face. “Eddie told me what happened. Said you were done with him and broke it off.” Bill says, his voice low and angry, “Then you miss school for four days, you don’t answer any of his calls or texts, and now you decided to show up back up with the announcement that you and Lilith are dating?” 

Richie opens his mouth to speak but Bill continues, “I knew you were no good for Eddie the first time he told me he liked you. I told him to be careful.” Bill gets closer to Richie, his eyes sparking with rage, “But he didn’t listen to me. He fell for you and gave you everything he’s got. And look what you gave him in return.” 

“I never liked you and I never saw what Eddie sees in you. Because all I see is a selfish bastard that didn’t deserve Eddie.”

Richie feels his knuckles pop from how tight he was clenching his hands. “I know! Don’t you think I fucking knew that Bill?!” Richie spits out, “But you better shut that fucking trap if you know what’s good for you Denbrough.” 

Richie shoves Bill away and storms down the hallway, ignoring the curious stares and loud whispers of the other students. He feels the burning glare of Bill’s eyes on his back as he continues his rage-filled stomp out of the school. His blood is boiling underneath his skin, bubbling violently. He was fucking angry. Who the fuck does Bill Denbrough think he is? Talking to Richie like that. Talking to Richie about Eddie like that. Fuck Bill and fuck his stupid face and fuck him for thinking he knows everything.

Richie walks out, deciding to just go home because God knows he wouldn’t be able to sit through eight hours of school after what had happened.

+

A knock was heard outside his balcony door and Eddie wished he had already turned off his lights. 

“Eddie.” Richie calls out from behind the door, “I know you’re in there and awake. Please let me in.” 

Eddie wishes he would just ignore Richie, wishes he could just switch off his lamp and dive under his covers until Richie got the hint and left. Maybe he could just avoid speaking to his _ex-boyfriend_ until graduation and leave Derry behind and never look back. But Eddie couldn’t do that, because he was in love. He felt it deep in his bones. He was so head over heels in love with a boy that couldn’t say that he loved him back unless it was behind closed doors. 

He didn’t care about that. He didn’t care that the boy he was so in love with couldn’t hold his hand and kiss him in public or take him out on proper dates or introduce him to his friends or family. He didn’t care that the boy’s father hated his guts. He didn’t mind it one bit because it didn’t matter. He was in love. He had everything, he was happy. He was so happy that when it all came crashing down, it shattered his world and left him with nothing. 

“Eds, please.” He hears Richie call out again, “Just let me explain.” 

Eddie slowly gets out of his bed and walks over to the door. His hands shook as he twisted the lock and opened the door. He was met with Richie staring down at him. Richie towers over him, his face was pale, eyes swollen, lips chapped and bitten-raw. He looked devastated. Eddie wanted to reach out and just _touch_ him, comfort him. But Eddie knew that he couldn’t, not anymore. 

“Why are you here Richie?” Eddie winced at the way his voice sounded. So broken and tired. “You said you didn't want me anymore, right? Moved on even, so why are you here?” 

Richie's mouth tightens, he closes his eyes. “But I _do_ want _you_.”

Eddie feels the anger bubbling up inside him, rage spills out of his body. “You fucking had me Richie! You’ve had me since the beginning!” Eddie yells, he shoves at Richie’s chest hard but it barely impacts the older boy, angering Eddie even more. “You were the one that left me and got yourself a fucking girlfriend.” 

A sob bubbles up in Eddie’s throat, he pushes at Richie’s chest again, this time Richie stumbles back. He hates Richie. He hates him. He hates the way he makes him feel. He hates that it hurt so much. He hates everything. 

“Fuck you Richie Tozier.” Eddie says, staring right into Richie’s eyes, seeing them glass over. “I wish I had listened to Bill and never got involved with you.” 

Eddie cries harder, so hard that he can’t tell if he’s breathing correctly. He turns his back to the boy on his balcony and walks back inside his room. He hears the scuffing of Richie’s sneakers and the rustling of leaves on the trellis as Richie begins to climb down. 

“I’m sorry Eddie.” He hears Richie say before he walks away and Eddie wonders how long he can cry until his body goes numb.

+

Richie sat at the dinner table and tried not to explode. Lilith is sitting in the chair next to his, politely answering his father’s questions about her classes and plans for after high school. His father seems pleased when catching up with Lilith, clearly approving of their relationship. And when he takes her upstairs to his room, his father didn’t come up to bother them once. 

Lilith is honestly a great girl, she’s sweet and funny and is pretty great at playing video games. She laughs at his horrible jokes and is always polite and just always seems perfect, just as she was when they dated freshman year.

But she’s not Eddie. She doesn’t snort when she laughs or shoves her feet into Richie’s face. She doesn’t have any freckles or likes monkeys or smell like lavender. Lilith isn’t afraid of the dark or picks at her cuticles or dog-ears her book pages. She can’t sit in silence with him and she never complains about any of the nicknames that Richie gives her. 

Richie wants to explode. She’s not Eddie. 

+

Richie loves Eddie. It truly terrifies him how much he loves the boy. 

There was a moment when Richie felt his life click into place. He can’t tell you the exact date, hour, minute, or even second but all Richie remembers was staring up at the ceiling of his bedroom at the large plastic stars and moons that Eddie decided to hang up and thinking that he couldn’t be without Eddie Kaspbrak. There was no other reason to live except for Eddie. Eddie was the air in his lungs, the blood in his veins, and the reason he gets up in the morning. He would lay himself down for Eddie. He would pluck every star out of the sky, break down every wall, he would rather die than be without him. 

For Eddie, he would do anything. 

+

“Lilith and I broke up.” Richie says, standing in the archway of the kitchen. “And I’m gay.” He gnaws on his bottom lip as he sees his father posture stiffen in his seat. 

“No you’re not Richie.” His father calmly responds as he stands up and faces Richie. “You’re not a fucking faggot.” 

“I’m gay and in love with Eddie.” Richie smiles. He’s never felt more free. “You can’t control me anymore, do you hear me? There’s nothing you can do about this.” 

He doesn’t see it coming but he feels it. He feels his head snap to the side and an immediate wave of pain courses through his body as the taste of iron spreads across his taste buds. He staggers back, blood drips out of his mouth and dots the white carpet beneath his feet. 

“What did I do to deserve a pathetic queer for a son?” His father growls, walking closer to Richie. He draws his arm back and goes for another strike but Richie moves before he could hit him. “Come back here and face me faggot!” 

Richie lets out a laugh. _Faggot._ He throws his head back and laughs, loud and hysterical. Richie feels his heart thump in his chest. He feels free and terrified and fucking insane. He laughs as his father strikes him again and again, on his stomach and his back. He laughs when his father spits on him, calling him faggot over and over. He laughs as he is dragged by his arm to his room, _Pack your shit and get the hell out of my fucking house._ He laughs because he finally did it. He came out.

So he packs his things, anything that can fit inside his large duffel bag, before climbing out the window. 

+

Richie doesn’t really know why he had run to Bill Denbrough’s house out of all places but here he was, sitting on Bill’s sink counter as Bill worked on cleaning up his injuries.

“Fuck, can you be any more rough?” Richie hisses when Bill wipes his split eyebrow too harshly. Bill throws him an apologetic look before getting back to work, more gently this time. It didn’t take long to bandage everything since the only injury that bled externally were on Richie’s eyebrow and his nose, most of his injuries were the bruises on his stomach and back. 

“What happened to you?” Bill finally asks. They were in his bedroom now, Bill on his bed and Richie perched on the window nook. 

Richie turns to Bill, the boy was staring at him with a serious expression plastered on his face. “Came out to my dad and it didn’t exactly go well.” Richie explains, he lowers both of his feet to touch the ground, “He did quite a number on me before kicking me out.” 

Bill’s eyes widened in shock and there was a hint of anger that graced his features. He runs a hand through his hair, “Shit. I am so sorry Richie.” 

Richie shakes his head and grins. “I’m not.” Richie confesses, “I’ve never felt more free in my life.” 

Bill doesn’t really know what to say, so he doesn’t say anything. He returns a smile as he watches Richie turn back to look out the window. 

It was nearing midnight and Bill was beginning to grow tired. He quickly grabs some extra pillows and a blanket from his closet and walks towards Richie who was still in the same spot, staring blankly out the window. He lays down the pillows and blanket at Richie’s feet. “You can stay here for as long as you like.” Bill says sincerely, placing a gentle hand on Richie’s shoulder and gives it a light squeeze. 

Richie looks up to Bill, “Thank you.” Richie says, “Not only for this, but for everything.” 

Bill shoots him a confused look, sitting down on the opposite side of the nook. “What else did I do besides patch you up?” 

“You called me out, about Eddie.” Richie confesses, shrugging his shoulders, “I don’t think I would’ve come out to my dad if you didn’t yell at me.” 

Bill looked at the boy in shock, thinking about how angry he was at him that day. He had hated Richie so much for what he did to his best friend. He had partly blamed himself for letting Eddie get so involved with Richie in the first place because he always saw Richie as a bad person that didn’t give a shit about anyone else but himself. But he realised now that that wasn’t the case at all.

“I’m sorry about that by the way,” Bill apologises, “It was out of line of me to say those things to you.” 

Richie shakes his head, “No dude, I needed to hear it. Seriously.” 

Bill just nods before a big grin spreads across his face and he hugs his knee to his chest. “You love him a lot, don’t you?” 

Richie seems taken aback at the question, his eyes growing wide. He swallows audibly. “Y-yeah.” Richie thinks of Eddie. The boy whose eyes are full of stories and ignited with emotions. The boy whose kisses are soft like dandelions and sweet like honey. The boy who smelt like lavender because he had read somewhere that scent makes people happier. The boy who was utterly lovely and amazing and just _magic_. “He’s it for me.” 

+

Richie feels his hands shake as he walks across the grass of Eddie’s backyard to his balcony.

He spots Eddie through the open doors, the smaller boy was cuddled up on a small patterned sofa that he and Richie had found at a thrift store a while back with a book in his hands. Richie smiles. He grabs onto the trellis and begins his climb up to the balcony, grateful that Eddie hasn’t looked up from his book. Richie swallows fearfully as he hops over the metal railing and stands on the platform. 

Eddie scrambles to stand up, his face twisted in confusion. Eddie was wearing Richie’s hoodie, a black one that he got at a concert a while back. He took in Eddie, with his fluffy hair and tan skin and bright eyes, he was so perfect. Eddie drops his book and awkwardly folds his hands over his chest as Richie approaches him. 

“Hi…” Richie blurts out. He stares at the little cluster of freckles that bunched up on the left side of Eddie’s cheek. 

“What are you doing here?” Eddie says and Richie wants to flinch at Eddie’s tone. He swallows again, shifting on the balls of his feet. _Why is this so hard?_

“I-er, I came out to my dad.” Richie swallows. Eddie blinks at him, surprised. “And he kicked me out.” 

“Oh.” Eddie said. Richie chews on the inside of his cheek, watching Eddie’s tiny feet shift on the wood flooring and his fingers clenching and unclenching the fabric of the hoodie. “I-I’m sorry.” 

Richie reaches out and grips lightly at Eddie’s arm making the smaller boy snap his head up to look at him. Richie feels his heart skip a beat when Eddie’s eyes meet his. “Eddie.” He says in a low voice.

“What Richie?” Eddie asks exasperated, “What are you doing here?” 

“I love you.” Richie breathes and he hears Eddie’s sharp intake. “I really really love you.” 

Eddie rips his arm from Richie’s grip and staggers back a step, “Stop Richie.” Eddie says quickly, “You don’t get to do this anymore, if you’re done then fine, but please leave me alone. Stop coming back and fucking giving me hope that you want to be with me and that you love me. It’s not fair.” He sounded so wounded and desperate and it was breaking Richie’s heart.

“But I want to be with you and I love you, with everything that I got.” Richie says and Eddie lets out a quiet sob. The smaller boy looked hurt and angry and hopeful. Richie takes a step forward and trails a hand up to cup the back of Eddie’s neck. He feels how hot Eddie’s skin was, burning the skin of his palm. 

“Stop it Richie.” Eddie says shakily but he doesn’t pull away from Richie. 

“You’re the best risk that I have ever taken.” Richie mumbles before he surges forward, kissing him on the mouth. It was messy and rough but Eddie didn’t seem to mind as he gasped loudly against Richie’s lips before hesitantly kissing back. Richie’s arm wraps themselves tightly around Eddie’s tiny waist as he backs them up against the wall. He feels Eddie’s hands slide up his chest and neck before settling them on both sides of Richie’s face, his fingers cold against Richie’s burning skin. 

Eddie pulls away first. “Do you really mean it?” Eddie whispers, tracing the pad of his thumb across the arch of Richie’s helix. His voice wavered, fearful but hopeful. And the way that Richie stared into his eyes was the only answer that Eddie needed, he grins widely, “I love you too.” 

Richie lets out a sob, feeling his tears wetting Eddie’s soft skin as he nuzzles his face into the curve of Eddie’s neck and inhales the familiar scent of lavender. He tightens his grip around Eddie’s waist. _He was never going to let go of this boy ever again_. 

+

It was a crazy journey to get Richie to where he was at this moment, finally breaking out from the character he forced himself to play. He was finally free to be with Eddie without the constant fear of getting caught by his father or any other kids at Derry High. Richie is able to kiss Eddie against the lockers like he always wanted to, he is able to show Eddie off to his friends (the ones that didn’t leave him after they found out he was gay), he was able to show the students at school that Eddie Kaspbrak was his fucking boyfriend! Yes, Richie was still scared of the judgement, having been hiding himself for so long, but he and Eddie were taking it one step at a time. 

Playing soccer was something that Richie knew was bound to be trouble. His father was still the coach of the team and after their last interaction - when Richie was kicked out of his home - he didn’t really know what was going to happen. But on the first day that he had shown up to practice, a whole week after being kicked out, his father didn’t spare him an extra look. He treated Richie like he did before everything went down, which didn’t exactly surprise the boy, though their one-on-one interactions decreased severely. His father was always Coach first and Father second after all. 

Richie never thought that he would end up here, three months till he graduated high school, moving in with his boyfriend. Richie from two years ago would have called bullshit because he couldn’t accept the fact that he was gay, but here he was, hanging up his clothes next to the clothes of the _boy_ he was madly in love with. 

Now, as he looked at the boy standing before him, he was glad for everything that had happened. Because every action and mistake that he has made led him to this moment. To Eddie.

“Richie!” Eddie says, irritated as he stares at how Richie hung up his clothes. “Would it kill you to section your shirts by colour? Why do you have so many Hawaiian shirts, I’ve never even seen you wear them. And why the fuck do you have a shirt that says Cream Cheese? You’re lactose.” 

Richie lets out an amused groan, throwing a look towards Eddie’s Aunt Florence who was sitting on the bed, watching her nephew angrily rearrange his boyfriends clothes. She shakes her head with a loud laugh. 

She locks eyes with Richie, her expression soft and loving, “Welcome home kid.” 

And for the first time in a long time, Richie was glad to be home. 


End file.
